"I wouldn't. If I were in his shoes, every morning I'd get up

singing, man. Do my work-out, take a shower, followed by a hearty

breakfast, steak and eggs, washed down with a pot of hot coffee,

six pack of Coors Lite. Then I'd order my bodyguard to go find my

babe, who would appear decked out in her all-black leather

Victoria Secret custom-made bodysuit. So I'd, like, have to chew

off all her clothes until she was completely nude. Except she'd

have these amazing dragon tattoos all over her body and pierced

nipples with little gold peace signs hanging from 'em. And then

she'd take out this half-ounce of blow, we'd snap out a few mondo

lines, vaporize a few million brain cells, screw for about an

hour, then spend the rest of the morning trashed watching

Gilligan."